- 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephen R. Covey
- Be Proactive
- Begin with the End in Mind
- Put First Things First
- The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene.
- LAW 1: NEVER OUTSHINE THE MASTER
- LAW 4: ALWAYS SAY LESS THAN NECESSARY.
- LAW 5: PROTECT YOUR REPUTATION AT ALL COSTS.
- The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage by Mel Robbins.
- First: “The moment you have an instinct…”.
- Second: “To act on a goal…”.
- Third: “You must push yourself…”.
- Fourth: “To move within 5 seconds…”.
- Fifth: “Or your brain will kill it.”.
We continue in this post in the self-improvement realm. we discussed in the previous article the importance of the self-help process, but we can’t talk about self-improvement without mentioning some of the best books.
Self-help is a vast domain, and it’s an obligation that we share what we know in this area, and also to help the reader narrow down his or her search for the right books to read. when we started our journey in the self-help process, we wanted to read books that are not a waste of our time.
And that’s why we made this series of articles, which consists of non-fiction books and fiction books, that we hope will be of good use for our reader.
It’s no surprise that you would find this book on our list because it’s the first book that I read when I first knew that I can improve myself and that being raised in a certain way doesn’t mean we can’t change that.
And why this book is so helpful in particular? you might ask, this book focuses on the things that shape our personality and how we deal with things, that is through our habits.
The author knew that making a profound change in someone’s personality, is by building good and lasting habits, that stick with him through his life. in which this book is titled the 7 habits of highly effective people, and those habits are :
As our modern societies keep evolving and getting more complex, it’s never been more important to build a habit that helps us face the different challenges in which get thrown into our faces daily. and those problems usually come in different forms. and dealing with them is where this habit shines.
By building this habit, you start looking at every problem as an opportunity to grow and improve. For example, when a business sales start to shrink, reactive people start saying things like, “why me”, “people are not loyal” or “I’m not a good boss as I thought I’d be”. these things make any problem worse and don’t help at all.
Instead what Stephen R. Covey tells us, that proactive thinking makes you always asking the right questions, that by answering them you would find the solution for any problem. in the example of the business owner, he said instead “How can I improve my business so my clients can’t live without my product”, his thinking will shift, and he will see that there is a solution, even if it requires a ton of work, but it’s better than blaming yourself, or people.
Imagine yourself at your funeral, I know it’s a bit extreme, and ask yourself these questions. What are the things you’d like to have done in your life, what accomplishments? Who you’d like to be there at your funeral ? and what you’d like them to say about you?
This is what the author means by beginning with the End in Mind. and that is we start by visualizing our end goals and start working towards accomplishing them.
And you can go further than this, write down three to five goals you want to accomplish in all the different domains of your life.
When you are done with your goals and dreams, think about your fear and what scares you, and try to think about a detailed answer of how you are going to handle it, let it be giving a best man speech or just asking the girl you like out and she refuses.
Aiming for the goals we set for ourselves, doesn’t happen without a clear understanding of the difference between what is urgent and what is important. that’s why bringing our goals to reality doesn’t happen without this habit.
bellow is a simple technique to make organizing priorities a bit clearerSummary Of 7 habits of highly effective people on hubspotThese were just three of the 7 habits and our friends at [HubSpot](https://blog.hubspot.com) wrote a great [article](https://blog.hubspot.com/sales/habits-of-highly-effective-people-summary) in which they summarize these 7 habits.
Law is the system of rules which a particular country or community recognizes as regulating the actions of its members and which it may enforce by the imposition of penalties. This is the definition of law in the Oxford dictionary.
The author titled his book the 48 laws of power, not something else because these laws have proven their validity over a long period of human history.
No one likes to be powerless, and self-improvement is all about taking ownership of all your flows. And to do so there are some laws to help with that.
We’ll introduce the laws from the this book and you can find a nice summary at readingraphics.com
• In your quest to impress the people above you, don’t flaunt your talents too much. If your superiors feel insecure, they’ll find ways to replace you. Even if you’re currently in favor, don’t take it for granted as you can easily fall out of favor with the wrong moves. • Instead, make those above you seem superior and smarter than you, e.g. ask for their help and attribute your ideas to their great advice. Give them the limelight rather than outshine them.
In a nutshell, you must play your moves smart, because the line between proving you are smart and outsmarting your superior is very thin.
Talking for the sake of talking is a charisma killer. We all know someone who is always talking, and that makes him or her powerless and vulnerable. Add to that The more you say, the less impressive and in-control you seem to be, and the higher the chance that you’d say something foolish.
But on the contrary. Powerful people tend to say little. This makes them impressive and intimidating; people can’t guess what they’re thinking and hang on to their every word and reaction. Short answers and silences also put people on the defensive; when they try to fill the silence by talking, they give away useful information.
Reputation is hard to build, and it takes time. And we not just talking about professional reputation, all kinds of reputations must be protected at all costs.
3. The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage by Mel Robbins
Meet Mel Robbins (the author) years back, when her husband struggled with his business, and she was jobless. She was drinking a lot and can’t get of bed, one night she saw a TV commercial that would change her life.
The commercial was so simple and yet so powerful, basically, it was the launch of a rocket, where the known countdown starts and after 1 the rocket launches, anyone who would watch that commercial will attach little importance to it, or just skip the channel altogether.
But not Mel Robbins, she found that commercial life-changing, and in fact it was. The next morning she counted down from 5, when she reached 1 she jumped from her bed. And that how the 5 seconds rule was founded.
in her book she broke the 5 seconds Rule down to a five elements or stages
self-improvement is all about acting on good instincts, and a good instinct is not buying everyone shots at the bar, or rush a decision without thinking it over. A good instinct is going for a run, or calling a relative, or as she put it
I define an instinct as any urge, impulse, pull or knowing that you should or should not do something because you can feel it in your heart and gut.
instincts are the urge to do something even when you are not feeling like doing it, and this feeling has a limited period of time, it takes about 5 seconds.
All instincts are not made equal, the good ones that you should act on, are the instincts that are tied to a goal. For example, let’s say you want to transform your health and be in a good shape, a good instinct for this goal is when you are sitting on your couch and you have the urge for a run, the goal of becoming healthier will help you use the 5 seconds rule effectively.
The third element is about pushing yourself, and it’s not going to be easy, it’s you versus your brain.
When you feel the instinct and it’s tied to a goal, now you have a window and it’s a small one, your brain is trying to shut down the instinct, now start counting down from 5. And once the countdown starts, you must know that there is no going back.
This element is about taking action, when you start counting down, it’s better to be ready to move physically when the countdown ends.
If you are preparing to go for a run, and you are sitting down stand up, and head to where you are putting your running shoes and put them on. When you want to speak your mind in a meeting, speak.
Self-help is about embracing change, and the 5 seconds rule is a mechanism to make change doable, but your brain sees anything that would push you out of your comfort zone as something dangerous.
This is why this rule is important, it outsmarts your brain, and the more you do it the more your brain will adapt.
These were just some of the books that we see are the most life-changing, we didn’t want you to be overwhelmed hence this list is short. We’ll be putting together another list with different titles. in the meantime apply what you find helpful from these books and remember that self-improvement is a never-ending process.